Dignity...

Follows grace and mercy, like a child follows an older sibling...determined to be part of the show, the event, the drama...standing slightly apart from the fireworks but always there, a bulwark in the storm...dignity is the unsung hero, the front line worker quietly going about their duty, asking nothing in return but to be involved...

Dignity has saved me in so many situations dear hearts...it gently knocks upon my heart and leaps to my lips to parry *ssholery of many types and styles...grace and mercy lay heavy upon my spirit these days...for myself and by extension for others...for those who wander across my path, or deliberately step on to it, whether friend or foe. I spoke truth one day to a man in uniform and had to pause, needed to take a breath, a moment to re-evaluate the statement spoken...'I have no enemies save one...'

I sat back a moment and thoughts of years past, of church family, friends and relatives flashed across the landscape of my memory so quickly I could barely keep up.

However...what coalesced, what sprang out center stage were the people I would run up against, determined to create drama, to create strife no matter the path taken to ease into a discussion, a conversation with respect each for the other.

Most often I found myself taking a breath and speaking even more quietly, softly but with confidence and determination to not be run over, spoken to with derision and bitterness.

I pause a moment now and come back with the realization that I never considered those people my enemies, never. Whether they were out for my destruction or just having a really 'karen-esque' moment (sorry to all those lovely karens out there), mattered not, and still to this day matters not. I knew I would change nothing about them despite the want to educate and create a friendship filled with mutual love and respect...change comes from within, but even more crucial to change is the ability to listen, to self-reflect and then apply it where necessary.

Dear treasures...the monsters we have dealt with? They are the epitome of stubborn selfish satirical, over-the-top narcissism...if change will come only with self-reflection and accepting certain difficult truths about ones self, they have doomed themselves to unhappiness for the rest of their days.

Do not be pulled into that life of hell, of torture...and if you are in as I was...don't stay there my dear friends...it is hard to believe with your head underwater; changing everything you hear, everything you see, twists all you know, burns the bridges to freedom down without impunity...it is hard to know you are worth more than that...you are worthy of clean pure oxygen, of the sun on your face warming your soul...you are worthy of leaving that land of ice, of coldness, of disgust and loathing...come warm your spirit by the fires of love, of joy, of peace and find it is good....

Yesterday was a day of quiet...of reflection...of making some adjustments to my thinking...of accepting that my evaulation of a new coworker was correct, despite my softer self saying, no no no, he's kind, smart, friendly...of understanding that my stance on his plan and place in my life is good, is right and the peace of God just flooded my soul.

I can trust my instincts, my gut telling me who this person truly is...seeing it and being kind, full of grace, mercy and their faithful sidekick 'dignity.'

Seeing it and standing firm amidst the wheels being turned, the words being spoken to coax, to convince...ah dear little baby Jesus...I can laugh now, the blinders are gone, trust has been developed between my mind and heart to such a point that no fight is necessary, just truth...spoken with dignity, with grace, with mercy and understanding of human nature.

I can stand back and watch the drama without being pulled into it....I can go home and sit in thankfulness to a God who never left me, never forsook me...no He waited patiently for my exit form hell and He waits for you too dear lost ones. There is hope and it springs eternal...grasp onto it, hold it tightly and you will find your way...

May God bless you with wisdom, with grace and mercy, with compassion and an unending Love...may He bless you with strength, with courage and with eyes to see...