He is Mine...

He is mine...mine...and I am His...His creation, His friend....His servant, His daughter...

Mine...always...I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, who shuts the mouth of the Lion, who protects and guards against all enemies small and large.

I can do nothing without the Love of the Father...I live and have my being, because of His grace, His mercy, and His protection.

I breathe yesterday, today and tomorrow...until there are no more tomorrows, only eternity spent with those I love and miss...waiting on me to step foot from this plane to that blessed light; greeted with love, with laughter, with joy...

I am His...I stand in the shelter of His mighty Arms, protected and never alone...

Never alone...

Yesterday evening I wrote as I sat with the lights off, boob tube (as our parents called it back in the day) off, phone set aside, only the crackling fire for company, for ambience, for cozy comfort in a time of continued peace. Oh it is not always so, but this is what we do, is it not my friends? This is where we find comfort, where we find peace and contentment...not online, not on the many, many distractions available at our fingertips...no...we find it in the quiet stillness listening to our own heartbeat, that still small voice whispering healing and encouragement...we find it within and without; in the sound of the wind soughing through the bare trees, in the infinite amount of bold and bright colours in the sunset taking up the entire Western sky, in the comedic hijinks of oversized pup and floofy irritated cat...

We find it on a walk across warm sand, waves tickling bare sand worms (translation- toes), warm breeze blowing strands of hair across eyes wide in wonder and awe at the works of Gods hands...the miracle of nature, of creation.

We find it in the last hand clasp of a close friend...in the warm embrace of a forever friend signalling 'home' and acceptance...in the sweetest kiss of a lover...

We are blessed...no matter the fires raging round us, the ravages life can bring to heart and mind...no matter where we go, no matter where we stand, we have the ability to see, to hear, to feel peace, to find peace within ourselves while the inferno engulfs and encroaches.

Oh we have been given a gift...to pursue life and all that means....the blessings, the sadnesses, the grief, the joy, the laughter....every little bit to be experienced to the fullest...

Surprising a laugh out of a coworker who sees all things serious...

Finding that smile blooming upon the face of the epitome of grumpier old men...the hug of a man who has fashioned himself to be your protector, taking time despite limitations to do the small things that matter. Giving love unconditionally, without thought to himself.

Oh, the goodness all round....it keeps head above water while treading and breathing through the waves crashing down...it reminds us of the capacity for humans to do GOOD...to give selflessly...to live upright, principled lives.

I speak here of my children and the pride I feel for the adult beings they have become...healthy pride, happy pride....capable, intelligent, kind human beings...the boys men of character who treat people with kindness and compassion, who live with talents and gifts beyond the pale and yet live in humility and grace.... my daughter a force to be reckoned with and who, once she truly sees what she can accomplish will change the world...truly. Oh, they aren't perfect and I wouldn't want that...our flaws are what keep us human, humble, contrite, empathetic...they allow us to see others for who they are with much less judgement and measure it against what we know we can do, could do, could be and yet still choose a life of honour and uprightness.

This gives hope...when I despair of anyone left who lives forthrightly with loyalty and commitment; I look on my children, I look on close friends who showcase love, goodness, grace and compassion...I look to true blue men in my life who embody what being a real man IS. And I look to the heavens from whence comes my help, my salvation....my God, who loves without condition, without reservation...looking upon his creation as we gaze upon our children, but with the vastness of space and time with an everlasting, ever-forgiving love...without judgement, without qualification...always and forever....

"O LORD, You have searched me

and known me.

You know when I sit and when I rise;

You understand my thoughts from afar.

You search out my path and my lying down;

You are aware of all my ways.

Even before a word is on my tongue,

You know all about it, O LORD.

You hem me in behind and before;

You have laid Your hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

too lofty for me to attain

Where can I go to escape Your Spirit?

Where can I flee from Your presence?

If I ascend to the heavens, You are there;

if I make my bed in Sheol, You are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle by the farthest sea,

even there Your hand will guide me;

Your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me,

and the light become night around me”—

even the darkness is not dark to You,

but the night shines like the day,

for darkness is as light to You.

For You formed my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother’s womb."

Psalm 139

No matter how far down that rabbit hole we have descended, no matter how dark, how dismal, how dank and dirty, filthy and shameful...He is there to scoop us back up again, with love, but more...with understanding of the creatures He has fashioned...with compassion for life and its obstacles, its sorrows....

Seek and you shall find dear treasures...seek and you shall surely find grace, compassion, real love (not the falsehood you have been shovelled), joy, peace unceasing, mercy with no hidden rules....you will find peace, freedom from fear....a life worth living because you're in it.

Oh walk my friends, for life is short.... life is finite....we get one chance...one....let us live each day, each moment with all we have...let us fit in two, three lifetimes in one....let us love without fear, without reservation....no matter the rejection of those who know not how to absorb love, how to allow it to seep in to every dry corner bringing life and joy in shoots of green and brilliant shafts of colour and energy...no matter, it costs us nothing....

Keep in mind dear friends...dear fresh out of pergatory survivors...we speak not of giving love to the takers, to the users and abusers...we speak of holding it close to our chest and praying for their Damascus experience...of giving your love from afar....out of reach of the toxic soup some would bring to the table...you need not sit there...we give of ourselves with the understanding that some will needs must be at a table reserved for the assholes, the narcissists, the psychopaths who take joy in suffering...oh yes, those tables we set where they belong, somewhere else as far away as the east is from the west.

Go now my friends and make your escape from hell, from Shaol....you need not remain there, you need not continue to feed a dying fire, emptying yourself of all you have to warm the cold, black soul of your personal monster. This is not required of you, of anyone....ever.

Love is a shared thing, or it exists not at all, yes? When the scales are unbalanced...when yours is heavy and skimming the bottom surface, while his/hers is up high in the clouds having a Big & Rich time...you suffer, he rejoices...you live in sorrow, he sips from the nectar of punitive damages.

No...I don't have to tell you, that is NOT love...it is not even close to mutual respect, or coming together out of mutual need...oh my friends, may your eyes truly see and with courage may your heart beat again in time with purpose, with a dream of acceptance...with a dream of being cherished, upheld, encouraged...all the things you give but will never receive from Dr. Jekkyl or Mr. Hyde for that matter. One is the raging evil creature, the other the lie, the falsehood, the mimicry...

Go now dear lost ones and live again....in all the beauty and messiness that is life...

Free...free from fear...free from loathing and disgust...free to experience life without fear of reprisal, without fear of derision and hate....

Walk tall...stand strong...and speak your truth, with grace...with mercy...with wisdom of the ages..