Night Moves...

I awoke in the night with dread, with tears, with dismay and disbelief....I dreamed a dream of such epic proportions I believed it for truth, for reality. The perpetrator of my sadness, of my sorrow had reached heights of wealth never possible in reality and my heart lay heavy laden, burdened with grief and questions for God...why....why had he been blessed despite the atrocities, despite the horrors big and small, committed in the past on myself and so many others. I felt betrayed and lost all over again...so many variables in this nightmare of sorts it would take pages to make my way through and explain each scene, each interaction. One stands out amongst all the rest...as I made my way through a monstrosity of a home being built I came to a room empty but for a small child. This little boy gazed upon me with resentment, with sadness and betrayal lining his smooth features. The eyes as large and amber as a tarsier...looking upon me with such accusation...I had abandoned him....left him behind in fleeing for my life, running for my sanity. Oh the tears as I spoke to him, hugging his stiff body to mine, speaking love...speaking truth, asking forgiveness.

This child, this hurting and abandoned little boy that lives in the heart of the one I ran from...this young boy holding all the potential, all the hurt, all the anguish that is consistently ignored, hidden, buried in pursuit of false happiness, false promises, false love...rooted in fantasy, based on shaky ground, built upon the sand so when the storms come, when the thunder rolls and lightning strikes, it is lost...stricken down until built again on the same spot, hoping for new life, for firm foundations.

Dear hearts...this morning I sit in forgiveness, in grace and mercy afforded me by one who loves without borders, without timelines, without reservation...I sit in prayer for that lost child speaking to me through my dreams and I hope for his rescue, his salvation.

This is all we can do...pray and move into the life truly meant for us.

I spoke to this child and do not recall all the words, just the meaning..the intent...the grief but oh, the love and grace imparted.

“With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible,” (Matthew 19:26).

The takeaway this morning, dear friends, is that with God we stand on firm ground, believing for miracles, within and without....for ourselves and for those around us, and those left behind despite the love lost...despite the pain and the sorrow....

Joy comes in the morning....let the tears come, and let them go....let the dreams come and let them fly on wings of angels, slowly receding into a sky as blue as the ocean...with bird song trilling outside my window I release the heartache and the burden of grief.

Let it go dear hearts and live....see the joy in all that you do...embrace love, happiness and forgiveness....speak your truth and see the world change within and without....

God knows you...sees you...right where you are and loves you with such depth it could never be plumbed, never be found wanting.

Stand tall warriors...renew your strength and walk out your path, your journey.

May God bless you this day and everyday with His grace, His mercy and His strength.