Quiet...

In the quiet stillness I sit...in the silent tranquility I rest...in a place of beauty and grandeur I gain strength...standing on a site of such beauty and peace I had to just stand and gaze out over the water amidst the giant Douglas Fir growing all round providing shade and coolness on a hot day. I looked around to see if my few compatriots were taking it in as well, wishing to share the thoughts swirling, the emotions flooding heart and soul...one was off like a shot to investigate something that caught her attention, the other two discussing the bringing down of a dead standing danger tree...a behemoth of such height and width it brought to mind Ents, tree-like sentinels...tree-beards from J. R. R. Tolkiens miraculously crafted stories.

One massive root growing off to one side, connecting with the mighty Fir beside it in some strange parody of holding hands...on this feeling, this connection of two living beings, the faller and I agreed...twice he ran hands over the twin fir apologizing for the work to be done as I went round carefully checking for nails driven into the proud tree....

Work continued nearby as we set to work demolishing an ancient table and constructing the new...only to be set aside as we stopped to clear the area and watched from a safe distance as the danger tree was brought down with a mighty whump....

Dear hearts, I was reminded of the things we need to bring down in our own lives...the dead and dying that we cling to in hopes of reviving, in hopes of loving into new growth....assessing the needs of our hearts, our spirits and minds and cutting down that which no longer serves to bring life, rather death of ourselves...

This tree connected at the roots and possibly shared nutrients, shared life...giving continually...

Despite our best efforts...despite the outpouring of love and affection, forgiveness and mercy, knowing when it has turned from love to grief...having the wisdom to perceive but more...to have the grace and strength and courage to acknowledge what our soul has been shouting, what our spirit has been whispering....that this life cannot be saved, rather...will not be saved...

Oh my friends...it is a painful realization...to know that we have been pawns only...the lowest of low chess pieces to be played...to be used...for their benefit always. To know that we are not seen for who we truly are...no...we are seen for what we can do for them, what we can bring to the table to make them happy and when that ends we are nothing...

I stand today to tell you, you are something! You are something special...something beautiful...something unique and lovely...

They...they are too blind, too dumb to see that God brought you into their lives to help heal, to guide, to showcase His love and forgiveness, His grace and mercy that never ends....

I stand today in prayer for your healing, for your strength and courage...

I stand today in love and true understanding of the grief and sorrow you are experiencing...

I stand today in peace, in grace, in mercy and speak words of affirmation...you are loved...necessary...needed...important...

You are vital in so many ways...please know this...despite standing in the midst of the putrid pit, you are untouched by the filth that lays about you. You have one who stands with you, right there in that place....you have one who guards, who protects, who sends His angels round bout you to keep you safe. Do not give up on hope dear treasures all...you have a place out of that lil shop of horrors...

I declare it to be good...I declare it to be full of peace, full of joy unshakeable....

May God show you how He views you...how others see you...full of grace and loving kindness...

May you see and know...may you grasp what is within and without...may you grab on with both hands the truth that will set you free....you are loved without measure...you are cherished beyond compare...you are accepted...accepted my friends....

I pray for your discernment...to see the lies...to see the filth and rise above....

God sets you above, He sets your feet on high places....

Oh, I hope you see...I pray you truly know and begin to walk it out....let yourself grow, let yourself shine...God is good my friends...He is faithful...

Psalm 86:6-7

'Hear my prayer, o Lord;

listen to my cry for mercy,

In the day of my trouble I will call to you,

for you will answer me.'

I cried out and God answered....

I stand today as a witness, as someone who has seen...as someone who has known trouble, has known the kind of fear that brings you to your knees...and I stood...amongst the filth, amongst the pit and saw...I saw the mask come off and the truth set me free. Oh how my heart shattered, how my spirit fell to the depths...and yet...light began to shine in...

The moments of such beauty, the moments of such magical quality I knew them only to be God given....the wind blowing up and raining down leaves in place...sun shining bright upon my head, leaves swirling above and around me...falling upon my face and into my hands as I turned in wonder...oh my friends...these moments will never leave my spirit for they sustained me in the midst of sanity busting distress, in the midst of a loveless, angry connection.

Go today...go today in the knowledge that you are loved...

Go today in His grace, His mercy, His love....

May He strengthen your mind, may His peace surround and uplift you...may His love uphold you...walk tall my friends...stand proud and know your worth.