Remember...

...all that you ran from....all the chaos you left behind...

...the criticisms couched in jokes....

...the ever present fear riding, freeloading upon your shoulders, your mind, the pit of your stomach...

...the lack of affection...the neglect, the abandonment...

...the insistence and perpetual searching for better, for more, for distraction while holding you, pushing you into the pit to watch as they traipse across your heart, mind, soul and spirit leaving behind lacerations, contusions...mentally, emotionally, physically....

Remember dear hearts...see... the good moments, the occasional affection, the scraps from the table designed to hold you in place, hoping...wishing...praying....ah my friends, it is an age old maneuver, no creativity nor originality to be found in any of the narcissists, psychopaths, sociopaths who employ such ploys and agendas.

I have been reminded of the capacity for evil...have been served up memories...my own and others...so often we live our lives in isolation, caught up in the day to day grind...ignorant of the absolute horror humans do to one another...thankfully.

I stood and chatted days ago with one of the medic teams...both veterans, having served their country overseas...one spoke of being a jail guard, shared one story of an incarcerated woman and what she had done...from where I stood, taking in the thousand yard stare and tone in which she spoke I was struck with the thought that what had been encountered as a jail guard was worse than ground zero with the military.

PTSD rode her back, shone from her eyes...witnessing the human capacity for depravity weighed heavily...

My friends...we stand for what is right and true or evil wins...again and again as eyes are turned away...It may sound dramatic to your ears, but I am more and more convinced that each of us has opportunity to stand, to hold up a hand and say no more.

Someone in my sleepy little town did that for me...did not know me, nor the man I was with...standing outside the grocery store in humiliation and fear so strong I could taste it...I share this story dear hearts for you...not for sympathy but for revelation, for instruction.

Yelling, arms waving...swearing and screaming at myself and his mother...

All it takes is one...one woman walking up to the store yelled a word, just one...and it startled him to awareness once more and the diatribe ended...

That woman yelled 'HEY.' That's it....

Ah the shame involved...relief, shame, embarrassment....speaking of those moments revives and rebukes, reminds and shines a spotlight on an unlimited number of reasons to never return, or to escape if you are still a prisoner to abuse. Run dear treasures...run to freedom from fear, to joy returning to your heart, to peace reigning in your home...

I go today to spend time with my most favourite of people and I rejoice that no longer do I need to fear returning home to anger, to suspicion, to humiliation and shame.

There is life outside that bubble of refuse and garbage they consign you to...a good life...a life they would rather you not know about, nor believe it possible for you.

All lies, dear dear friends...you are capable of anything you put your mind to, including loving yourself enough to stand...

Stand with the knowledge and grace strapped about your waist...walk with Truth as your sword and shield....believe in something better, something more...for you, for each one of you.

You are worthy...worthy of actual love and acceptance...not just mouthed words backed up by actions of hostility, anger, bitterness, derisiveness, degradation....words meant to twist the meaning of something special, something meant for goodness and grace...

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 'Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.'

Love is...

Patient...

Kind...

Honorable...

Truthful...

All the signposts are there for us to read...all the red flags waving vigorously in full view...

Perhaps too late to get out before pain has set in, before love has taken over, before trauma has trapped, bound, chained and roped you in...

But dear treasures...we see them eventually, though a veil of fear, terror and shame...as though somehow all these things mean they were right, that we are useless...no good...not enough...

Lies...manipulations...mind-f*ckery...to bind you in place, to their side through thick, through thin, through a slap to the face...through a push to the ground...through cheating...through lies and betrayals...

Enough my friends...enough of the evil borne, carried...you are worth so much more than the horror, yes horror, you are put through each day. 'oh it's not always bad....' Sound familiar dear hearts?

I could go on, and on, and on...expostulate all the day long on the many, many ways the monster in your life traps you...how you do not deserve to be treated so...

And so I shall...each day a tribute to what you carry and do not need to...

Each day a prayer for your release, for your freedom...

Each day a reminder of what love truly is, and what it truly is not...

Go today in the thought that you are loved, as you are...always....

Cherished, accepted, loved beyond measure....

May you stand in that knowledge, may you make your way to freedom in that knowledge.

May you walk with shoulders back, head held high...may shame fall from your back as truth becomes your shield...walk softly dear treasures, carry a giant stick...speak your truth with grace, with dignity, with a deep deep knowing of your worth....