Toil, Toil and Trouble...

It begins with a stray thought...it continues with subsequent clacking of railway tracks as the trouble train takes off into that good night.

It ends with pandemonium...it culminates in distress, in grief, in questions ever unanswerable.

Dear treasures all...this way lies darkness, this way leads to pits previously dug by the monster you left behind, the abuse you ran from in favour of loving you, protecting that unprotected traumatized child within...

These pits are laid out systematically and with forethought...

Any rumination that speaks to 'well maybe they didn't mean it,' or 'they did it out of a tortured mind,' can only lead to more chaos, more grief as it becomes harder to digest the hard truth.

The hard truth is dear hearts, that they mean every word, every strike of hand and fist, every betrayal worthy of Machiavelli himself.

The hard truth my friends is that they delight in your pain, in your confusion...

They take joy in that stumble to the left, that trip over the block to your right, the face first dive into mud and grit and sand...

Even as they bend to pick you up, brush off the dust and grit, they are readying for the next pitch, only adding to the confusion and mayhem currently running the show in mind and heart.

I write today these many, many months out in hopes once again of alerting that lost and stolen heart of danger, of the lies that will be told to once again bring you back into the enemys camp. For, are they not our enemy? Even our enemies treat us better than the so-called love of our lives.

They lie to embrace, to cajole and then in disgust at your rapid footwork to come 'home' they up the games, pour out more evil abuse upon your loving heart and bright-as-light spirits. Truly.

They seek your destruction my friends....right down to the core....they wish nothing more than your distress; financially, emotionally, sexually, mentally.

Casting you down into pits they have fashioned especially for you...and for the next, and the next and the next bright light they can glom onto.

All these pits pre-dug so that when you finally do distance yourself, run for your life, they await you in the dark...they await your tender hearts cry...they await your sorrow and grief.

Give them not one more inch...not one more. They deserve it NOT.

YOU...you are deserving of all the love you have given out.

You are deserving of all that compassion, forgiveness, kindness, grace and mercy.

Not them, never them.

Sounds harsh to the empathetic heart...harsh to the spirit meant to nurture lost souls.

They are not lost my friends...oh no, they are not lost.

They are EXACTLY where they want to be and only a major, major, major miracle of God himself would set them back on a path of seeking recompense and forgiveness and you are not meant to lay your life down for evil while awaiting this miracle.

You are not meant to lay down your life for those who seek IT...who seek to devour.

You are meant for more...so much more.

Go now and live life to the fullest no matter the clinging webs of thought and grief.

Joyful memories will replace the horror...

Loving kindnesses will fill in the holes dug for your destruction, leading you on to hope, to life well lived and well loved.

Go now in the grace and mercy of God who loves you so enormously, so completely, as you are, right this minute and always.

Find your way dear hearts, for there is a way for each one of us that leads to a life fulfilled and full of joy.